If what doesn't kill us is making us stronger,
Were gonna last longer,
Than the greatest wall in China,
Or that rabbit with the drum
If there's one thing that I learned,
While waiting for my turn,
Is that in each life some rain falls,
But you also get some sun,
And we'll make out better than ok,
Hear what I say? Yeah,,,,,,, any day...

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Some would say that putting a white trash family on TV would not make for a great television show. But ya know what, Roseanne seemed to change all that. She was a strong woman with a family that through their turmoil had heartfelt moments thrown in with tragedy and hillarity.

Thats kinda whats on my mind right now. I have absolutely no control over anything I am feeling. Or for that matter, Smelling. I am shaking my head like I always do, to make my hair better. And I just smell Trey on me. I mean we were together last night but I showered and washed all of my hair and body. But I can still smell him. God right now it is so hard to be without him. He is headed off to a rave party in Iowa City and all I want to do is be with him. I called him and he said he wished I would have come. And lord knows I would have, if only I hadnt spent all night with Trey so I wouldnt have not slept. Cause then either I would have gone to FarmHouse like I should have or gone with IC. And talkin about FH. I would have gone to FH if only I wasnt such a friggin mess. I know if I had gone I would have been miserable looking, because I suck at tryin to hide my emotions. And Heath would have said something, and then it would have been a conversaton, and it would have just sped up my breakdown. Which is inevitatble. It sucks to break down but I always learn something from each of the times when I do. And theres more thats boggin me down I mean I have gone around being reassured by Simonson and Rodde about my being able to be in ISU Singers no problem. But lord knows because of my tremulous relationships with people, it is very hard for me to trust people. And I am so afraid of FH but so excited at the same time. I am afraid that the guys who seem to have taken me in by giving me a bid wont want me after I move in. So it takes my excitement for moving in and mixes it with hesitation.