I take pills
To regulate my mood
To alleviate the negative
So that everything will
Have a cheery disposition
The negative thoughts
Still occur in my mind
However not as prevalent
I think these pills numb
Me to all that I do feel
To the pain of love
To the pangs of yearning
Do they hinder
My want to go to him
My desire for love
Do they block my memory
Of all that we had
Or do these pills make me
Think everything is good
That everything regardless
Will end up in the end
Cheery as it all started
Do I really want this
This affected life?
---------------------------Why is it
That I wish
To run to you
And yet I stop
Myself from that
When more than anything
I wish to be near you
To feel your warmth
Your slight frame
To smell the smoke
On your being
To touch you
To hold you close
And never let go
Because I love you
But I stay away
Miles to go to get to you
That could be crossed so easily
But yet it seems
As though I do not wish to go
Although the yearning
Burns intensely as
The full moon shines
On a dark night
With a barren sky
When will the day
Come where I stand
And run to you
------------------------
The day will come
That I will run
Straight to you
But what will you say
How will you respond
Will you accept me
With open arms
Or will you remain
As distant as we currently
Stand apart
And distanced
The demeanor that cuts
So deep that the wounds
Will not heal
They will only bleed
I wish
More than anything
That you will not stand
That you will run to meet
Me on road
And embrace me
Just like you once did
And that things will start
From the moment they stopped
For they never have
It was only quiet
But never done
Never will it end
Even when we both end
This will not be the end
Of the love I have for you
And the love I hope and wish
That you have for me
------------------------------------
I can say the things
I wish to hear you say to me
I Love You
You say that you do
Not wish to be hurt
And you did not wish to start
Or end the way things did
But I Love You
And will remain doing such
Until the end of time
And if those words
Are never uttered by you
There will be a part of me
That will burn intensely for them
But I do Love You
And that what counts
Because nothing can change my Love
For you
Your actions seem to speak
So much louder than words
And I wish to interpret
Your actions as such
To say that you love me
But I do not wish to assume
I do not wish to hurt more than I do
So I do not lead
I do not jump
I do not wait but
I won’t mind
If they come