what is this feeling?
so sudden returning to me?
the feeling wanting me to return
to where i grew up
driving a hole
into the pit of my stomach
i for some time
had been fighting a feeling
of attraction to the gendered
and thought i had made serious progress
but when i heard about you
it took me back to where i was before
not destroying past work
but a path back
so here i stand
at a fork in the road
one leading forward
one leading backward
but the backward path
guarentees nothing
who says if i turn
that the world will fall
in place as i have in my head
who says he will turn to me
and the distance would hurt
i do remember the past
i know right from wrong
but the feeling
pulls me apart
to choose
is a battle
neverending