this trip to sweden with the family only further proves
medication is in fact my friend
and that i am still very unhealthy and unstable

i
however
am a growing and changing person
who is still worth the effort
and time
and even though i have negative thoughts
they are no longer self defeating in the sense that
i would end my own life
they are limited to natural and pseudo natural causes
ending my life
no worries tho
it wont happen
or maybe it will
but it will not be known to me

lets also put this here

i really love some people
and i hope they read this

last i knew

one of them still did

thanks kevin

and thanks everyone else who may be reading this